My dearest Mr. Bill,
It nearly warmed my heart when I received the invite to your fabulous Christmas dinner. I say nearly, for as you know, my heart is and forever will be made of ice.
Even though it is very kind of you to think of me, please understand – I can’t attend for the cold of my soul would douse off the Christmas flame. It’s all right though, don’t worry. I prefer the chills of loneliness anyway. It’s my fate and it will be so forevermore.
Although it appears someone thinks I deserve more? When my servants went to pick up the post the other day, there was a package there for me as well as your letter. And not just any package, but a fully-formed Christmas present! Can you imagine it? A Christmas present for me? Absolutely unheard of! Tell me, Mr. Bill, was it from you? Or was it that Santa fellow, or the two rapscallions Ralphie and Rudy, that happen to enjoy my snow kingdom so much, who knows... It would be nice to think anyone would actually want me to thaw, but alas, I know it just may not be.So, thank you, again, for your warm invite, but unfortunately, it is too warm for me. Don’t loose your hat in the blizzard!
The Snow Queen